Tiger Woods is paying his wife $750 million in a divorce settlement. Oh, and you think that is crazy? Well, it only gets better. Here are some other conditions of the agreement...
- He is not allowed to have any girlfriends near their kids.
- The only women allowed around them are people who work for Tiger that his wife already knows, and Tiger's wife (if he ever has one again).
- She gets sole physical custody of their kids but they will split legal custody.
So what does Tiger get out of this. Well, his wife is can never publicly speak out over his alleged flings with socialite Rachel Uchitel, reality star Jaimee Grubbs, porn queen Joslyn James and up to 17 others. So, no tell-all books, TV spots, or anything like that. Not really a win, but at least it is something. Than again, there is really no reason for any of that is you just got paid $750 million.
Sorry, what Tiger did was wrong, but his wife doesn't deserve all this money. I mean if he gave her like $10 million, could she not get through he life easily? I mean she didn't earn this money. She didn't win those majors. She didn't do shit other then somehow not know that her husband was banging anything that moves.
Anyways, I just wanted to leave a message for Elin Nordegren... I will do anything to be with you, your body, and your newly found $750 million dollars.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Tiger Woods Pays Wife $750 Million!
Hawks About To Resign Joe Johnson
Reports are coming out that the Hawks are giving Joe Johnson a max deal for 6 years (worth roughly $119M), and that he is going to take it within the next day or so. I have to say I am a little surprised. Johnson really has choked in the playoffs the last two times, and did not have nice things to say about the fans in Atlanta after the were eliminated this year. I really like Joe Johnson, but I really don't see him as a "max guy", especially for 6 years!
Anyways, at least we know him and Lebron won't be playing together.
Breaking News: Bruins Resign Paille
Daniel Paille has signed a two-year extension with the Bruins today. It is a $2.15 million contract, giving him a $1.075 million annual cap hit. I don't mind this signing, but I do have to say I am a little surprised. After they didn't sign Paille to a qualifying offer before Monday's deadline I thought he was a goner, but it actually worked out for the Bruins, because if they did sign him before Monday the deal would've had a $1.35 million annual salary, and he would have gained arbitration rights.
I always feel like Paille could be awesome, but that is just me being delusional, but he is a good penalty killer, and a very solid 3-4 line wing.
Another Red Sox Hurt
Delcarmen (the pride of Hyde Park) actually had been one of the better Red Sox relievers so far this year, until roughly a week ago. Well, now we have a possible reason for it, as Manny Delcarmen just told reporters that he is having issues with his right elbow and will see the doctor tomorrow.
That could explain why in his last 3 outings, he has faced 14 batters and got only 3 of them out (1 IP, 9 H, 9 ER, 2 BB, 0 K). This is bad news for the Red Sox, as their bullpen has been far from great this season, but it is even worse news for Delcarmen, since he has already had Tommy John surgery once in his career.
The only good news is that he was still throwing 95, so hopefully it is something that just needs some rest.
In other Red Sox news DL Drew has a stiff neck and is day to day...shocking.
Is Richard Jefferson Retarded?
Richard Jefferson surprised everyone Wednesday when he opted out of his contract for next season that would have paid him $15 million. What the fuck could he possibly be thinking???
He is coming off of one of his worst years ever, and there is no way he'll make anywhere near that amount next season. I know everyone is freaking out, because of the new CBA is coming, but Jefferson was so bad (12 pts 4.4 rebs - lowest since is rookie season in 2001) that I just don't see anyone wanting to take a risk on him. I think he can come back next year and be decent, but I just don't see anyone giving him anywhere near what he was going to make next season.
Anyways, he sucks, but since he has already opted out I think he should not resign with the Spurs. Their offense obviously doesn't fit his game, and he would be better off somewhere else.
Cavs Signs Byron Scott To Coach
Byron Scott will be named the coach of the Cleveland Cavaliers at some point today. I can't fucking stand Bryon Scott and is smug attitude. The only reason I am kind of happy about this is because he is not coaching the Celtics, and he won't be on ESPN as much (well at least analyzing).
Scott is so fucking overrated. He is under .500 for his career, and really Chris Paul going off 1 year was the only real reason this guy even won Coach of the Year in 2008, but then again he has to be better then what the Cavs had before.
I don't think this will have much influence on Lebron, because I really don't think he cares who is coaching. No matter where he ends up he will be the leader of that team, and it is looking more and more like it could be Chicago, since they have the best overall team that is going after him (and they are really young).
Go Do This Now
DP found something incredible the other day, and you all need to take advantage. Just follow these steps.
1. Go to Google.
2. type in 2204355
3. click "I'm feeling lucky"
trust me you'll love it.
Smoked Salmon Flavored Vodka
I like to try everything. When I go to a restaurant I normally get the weirdest thing on the menu just to try it, however, I have no interest in ever taking a shot of smoked salmon flavored vodka. I just don't see how it could ever be good, and I don't know who would buy this except drunk, poor, eskimos because I just couldn't see myself saying hey BMack lets get some smoked salmon vodka. Shit's gay.
die.
Rays 9, Sox 4
Well the Sox ruined another superbly pitched game by Dice K and Matt Garza once against bests the Sox. The Red Sox didn't have runner get past first base through five innings and by that time Dice K only let up 3 runs.
But the shit really hit the fan when Manny Delcarmen came in the 8th. He faced five batters in the eighth and all of them scored. His troubles began when he allowed a single to Evan Longoria. Carlos Pena followed with an RBI double and then took third on a single by Joyce. A walk to Jaso loaded the bases and Sean Rodriguez followed with a two-run single.
Scoring Summary:
 | 4th | K Shoppach doubled to deep center, M Joyce and J Jaso scored. | 2 | 0 |
| 4th | B Zobrist singled to center, K Shoppach scored, B Zobrist to second on throwing error by first baseman K Youkilis. | 3 | 0 |
 | 6th | D Ortiz doubled to deep center, E Patterson scored. | 3 | 1 |
| 8th | C Pena doubled to deep right, E Longoria scored. | 4 | 1 |
| 8th | S Rodriguez singled to left, C Pena and M Joyce scored, J Jaso to second. | 6 | 1 |
| 8th | J Bartlett homered to left (378 feet), J Jaso and S Rodriguez scored. | 9 | 1 |
| 8th | D Ortiz doubled to deep right center, M Scutaro and E Patterson scored. | 9 | 3 |
| 8th | A Beltre hit sacrifice fly to center, D Ortiz scored. | 9 | 4 |
Hot Chicks World Cup: Russia vs. Argentina
Our second and final semifinal is between two countries that are completely different. Cold Russia, hot Argentina. But who has hotter chicks?
VS.
For more of Russia vs. Argentina, and to see who goes to The Finals, Click Here. (NSFW).
Tomorrow we'll have the All-Tournament Team, the hottest 11 girls of the competition.
-The Commodore